"If we are interested in someones mental health, the relevant question may not be how much self-esteem [someone] has. Rather, it's how much [his/her] self-steem varies depending on what's going on in [his/her] life- for example, how successful she/he is or what other people think of him/her...People with 'true/uncondtional' self-steem would probaly feel pleased or excited when they succed and dissapointed when they fail. But their feelings of worth as people would not fluctuate as a function of those accomplishments, so they would not feel aggrandized and superior when they succed or depressed and worthless when they fail."
Alfie Kohn
Unconditional Parenting Page 44.
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