Back to Basics: Don't forget to be human.

Great advice for teachers and parents...and non-parents!

"To be a caring person, though, an educator must first be a person. Many of us are inclined instead to hide behind the mannerisms of a constantly competent, smoothly controlling, crisply authoritative Teacher… To do so is to play a role, and even if the script calls for nurturance, this is not the same as being fully human with children. A real person sometimes gets flustered or distracted or tired, says things without thinking and later regrets them, maintains interests outside of teaching and doesn't mind discussing them. Also, a real person avoids distancing maneuvers such as referring to him or herself in the third person (as in: “Mr. Kohn has a special surprise for you today, boys and girls”).

Here, again, what initially looks like a common sense prescription reveals itself as challenging and even controversial. To be a person in front of kids is to be vulnerable, and vulnerability is not an easy posture for adults who themselves had to strike a self-protective pose when they were growing up. Moreover, to reach out to children and develop genuine, warm relationships with them may compromise one's ability to control them. Much of what is wrong with our schools can be traced back to the fact that when these two objectives clash, connection frequently gives way to control."

Alfie Kohn

How do we regulate our emotions?

I recently finished the book "How we decide" by Jonah Lehrer. I highly recommend it. He talks about the importance to use the different parts of the brain for different types of decisions, and to do this, we need to think harder (and smarter) about how we think. Here is an interesting quote, an interesting strategy for developing emotional intelligence both in children and adults.

"How do we regulate our emotions? The answer is surprisingly simple: by thinking about them. The prefrontal cortex allows each of us to contemplate his or her own mind, a talent psychologists call metacognition. We know when we are angry; every emotional state comes with self awareness attached, so that an individual can try to figure out why he is feeling what he is feeling. "

Jonah Lehrer, How We Decide
http://www.jonahlehrer.com/books/how-we-decide/

UNDERSTANDING THE LANGUAGES OF FRIENDSHIP

 "Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born."
- Anais Nin

Since the moment we are born we start building strong relationships with others creating a social network that supports us through life.  Early in life, connections with family take center stage but as we transition to school our experiences broaden. As we share spaces and time with unfamiliar individuals, we are no longer strangers. A community is born taking on a life on its own where people become free enough to share and secure enough to get along. Our social capital rises, but it does not stop there. A higher level of connectedness is then possible. It is a bond by choice not by chance.  It is a bond that can last a season or a lifetime: friendship.

How do we make friends? How do we connect with others on an emotional level that creates such a special bond? It requires being open and willing to experience a selfish act of love. According to Dr. Gary Chapman there are five main love languages:

• §  Words of Affirmation
• §  Quality Time
• §  Giving or Receiving Gifts
• §  Acts of Service
• §  Physical Touch

On some instances the process is organic and seems flawless. Other times, when conflict or social challenges arise, the languages are powerful tools to guide us in the process of being translators and facilitators of the process of getting to know each other better and potentially become friends.

Book: The Five Love Languages of Children. Dr. Gary Chapman

Play: How It Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul.

Play: How It Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul. ~ Stuart Brown


Stuart Brown (Author)

It addresses the importance of playing and being creative. The authors conclude that play is how some of our greatest thinkers, inventors, CEOs, etc came to be successful – through using their imaginations, and tinkering, and believing in what wasn’t ever before. They believe that the current generation may suffer from not being allowed to use their minds creatively.

What is the purpose of schooling?

"We are told constantly that the purpose of schooling is to prepare our children to compete in a global economy. There is rarely any mention of a broader vision of education that includes a focus of the whole person. The emphasis is primary economic. "Education" in many cases has become a series of tests and hurdles rather than focusing on learning."

Source: Education and the Soul. Toward a spiritual curriculum. John P. Miller

Rudolf Steiner (1861-1925)

Rudolf Steiner was an Austrian philosopher, scientist and artist. He was the creator of the school system known as Waldorf Schools. His philosophy emphasized the children’s spiritual development, imagination and creative gifts. He believed that different areas of development and learning were connected into a kind of unity and teachers should allow the innate self motivation to predominate.

http://www.rudolfsteinerweb.com/

The Price of Privilege

http://www.thepriceofprivilege.com/excerpt.html

Has our overinvolved parenting style created a generation of kids with an impaired sense of self?

Teaching about the Holidays

Beyond Heroes and Holidays: A Practical Guide to K-12 Anti-Racist, Multicultural Education and Staff Development by Enid Lee

A People's History of the United States and A Young People's History of the United States by Howard Zinn (more for adult and older student reading...good informational text and for teachers' background knowledge)

NurtureShock

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/04/books/review/Paul-t.html?scp=18&sq=mother%20child%20bond&st=cse

"What comes around goes around, goes away and then comes back. In a chapter on overpraise, the authors describe laboratory studies in which children, having taken an initial test and then been praised for their intelligence, fared worse in follow-up rounds, while children who were instead commended for their effort challenged themselves further and performed better over all. Frequent and oft-undeserved rewards in the form of praise, the authors caution, deprive a child of motivation and discourage persistence. “It’s a neuro­biological fact,” they write, pointing to studies of M.R.I. scans and trained rodents. True, but far from new. Albeit without the sci-techy benefit of brain imaging, in 1964, “Children: The Challenge,” a popular manual of the day, warned, “Praise, as a means of encouragement, must be used very cautiously.” It can be “dangerous” if a child sees praise as a reward and “could easily lead to discouragement,” the author, Rudolf Dreikurs, noted."

By: Arusyak Sargsyan

Literacy

Reading Magic: Why Reading Aloud to Our Children Will Change Their Lives Forever – Mem Fox
The Power of Reading: Insights from the Research – Stephen D. Krashen
The Read-Aloud Handbook – Jim Trelease
The Art of Teaching Reading and The Art of Teaching Writing by Lucy Calkins
The Reading Teacher Book of Lists
Words Their Way by Donald R. Bear
…And with a Light Touch by Carol Avery
Classrooms that Work by Patricia Cunningham and Richard Allington
Phonics They Use by Patricia Cunningham
Self-Paced Phonics by Dow and Baer
The Literate Kindergarten by Susan Kempton
Mosaic of Thought by Keene and Zimmerman
The Power of Reading by Stephen D. Krashen
The Reading Zone and In the Middle by Nancy Atwell

Cognitive Development

The Power of Play: Learning What Comes Naturally – David Elkind, Ph.D.
Mindset: The New Psychology of Success- How We Can Learn to Reach Our Full Potential – Carol S. Dweck, Ph.D.
Raising Lifelong Learners: A Parent’s Guide – Lucy Calkins with Lydia Bellino

Discipline

Kids Are Worth It: Giving Your Child the Gift of Inner Discipline – Barbara Coloroso
Last Child in the Woods: Saving our Children from Nature-Deficit Disorder – Richard Louv
The Loving Parents’ Guide to Discipline: How to Teach Your Child to Behave Responsibly-With Kindness, Understanding, and Respect - Marilyn E. Gootman, Ed.D.

Education Issues

In Defense of Our Children: When Politics, Profit, and Education Collide – Elaine M. Garan, Ph.D. Punished by Rewards: The Trouble with Gold Stars, Incentive Plans, A’s, Praise, and Other Bribes – Alfie Kohn
The Schools Our Children Deserve: Moving Beyond Traditional Classrooms and “Tougher Standards” – Alfie Kohn What Does it Mean to be Well Educated? And More Essays on Standards, Grading, and Other Follies – Alfie KohnSavage Inequalities: Children in America’s Schools – Jonathan Kozol
Testing is Not Teaching: What Should Count in Education – Donald H. Graves
The Case Against Standardized Testing: Raising the Scores, Ruining the Schools – Alfie Kohn
The Price of Privilege: How Parental Pressure and Material Advantage are Creating a Generation of Disconnected and Unhappy Kids-Madeline Levine, Ph.D.
The Hurried Child: growing up too fast too soon – David Elkind, Ph.D.

Conflict Resolution / Principles of Non-Violent Communication

The Compassionate Classroom - Sura Hart and Victoria Kindle Hodson

Social & Emotional Development

Best Friends, Worst Enemies: Understanding the Social Lives of Children – Michael Thompson, Ph.D. and Catherine O’Neill Grace

Emotional Intelligence – Daniel Goleman

NurtureShock: New Thinking About Children - Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman